I am rather "run down" lately. I know different factors are involved, but a sizable one is dealing with Anthony every day. I recently mentioned many of his obsessions. I also generally have to feed or otherwise assist him to eat all of his dinner (or expect to be awakened at night because he is hungry). On top of that, I habitually deal with him going to the toilet a minimum of three times a day--upon awakening, after returning from school, and at bed time. A fourth precautionary trip is often added after dinner.

I also shower with him most evenings, and brush his teeth. Showering of course involves washing areas I really don't want to wash on an adult-sized person. Then I need to dry him off, including those same areas. I get (or my wife gets) out his clothes and ensures that he changes himself, morning and night. At bedtime, his bed sheet usually needs to be tucked in again because he pulls it out some time before he falls asleep, or in the morning when he wakes up. All told, I estimate that I easily spend at least 45 minutes to an hour of every day dealing with Anthony in some fashion.

The time spent doesn't tell the whole story, though. As I mentioned with the showering, most of dealing with Anthony is not pleasant. Most of what I need to do is negative, if only a little. But little negatives here and there add up.

My wife has offered to help me with Anthony, but I really don't want her to. I understand that it would be even less pleasant for her to deal with him in the bath; I would be even less happy dealing with an autistic child if the child were female. My wife worked for a short time as a Certified Nursing Assistant in a nursing home, where she had to tend to similar needs for older patients. Knowing this does not make me more willing to push Anthony on to her; she does enough for our family, including things that I might otherwise do, as it is.