Thursday, January 21, 2010

I came very close this evening to responding to a friend of my sister on Facebook. I am probably too tired, too stressed, too sick of being sick, or a combination of those conditions to think reasonably. Nevertheless, I do not know the person who responded to my sister, and realized that my opinion would likely offend her, so I refrained from acting on my impulse.

My sister posted something supporting donations for a charity related to autism--a worthy cause, to be sure. Her friend commented, "Glad to see this. [Name withheld] works almost every day with autistic children, they are so very special!"

I have heard the word "special" applied to autistic children many times by people who are peripherally familiar with them. On the other hand, I have never met a parent of an autistic child that would refer to that child as "special", at least if the term is meant to have a positive connotation. Of course, autism covers a wide range of disorders, so perhaps there are those I have not met who would prove me wrong.

Certainly, being parents of Anthony has taught my wife and me empathy for others that we may not have gained for many years otherwise. We do indeed feel, correctly or not, that we are better people for the experience. However, I cannot describe what it would mean to me to have a period of time, even a short one, wherein we could have a "normal" existence. As with most who have issues significantly outside the standard realm, we did not expect to become "other people" as in the phrase, "that only happens to other people". I may still be in denial after all these years.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

A severe cold virus has slowed our household considerably the last two weeks; I have reluctantly used two(!) of my seven annual sick days this week. I mention this only because Anthony gives me, almost without fail, two or three topics a week that would be worthy of posting, yet I haven't been able to attend to my regular obligations since New Year's Day, let alone feel like writing. But, before a couple of them fade from memory completely. . . .

Anthony turned the temperature control in the refrigerator/freezer to zero several times in the last week or so, thawing the frozen items each time. I ultimately resorted to pulling off the control knob. It will be much more difficult to determine if he has been able to reach in to twist the actual metal control inside, but he probably will not be able--or have the inclination--to do so.

******

My wife went out to shovel snow recently and wanted Anthony to go outside with her so he could not wreak havoc on whatever he might get his hands on inside the house. Getting him to put on his coat is normally a matter of course, but this time he was adamant in his resistance. My wife finally realized that he had not changed out of his sweatshirt and sweatpants worn to bed. Although that would be acceptable attire around the house, Anthony apparently knew he had not changed into his "real" clothes for the day, and could not reconcile the two ideas.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Anthony's teacher found that she could keep him somewhat occupied by listening to music on a portable player, but only with the older style of headphones that fit up against the ears rather than in them. We will gladly take any suggestion that helps to manage him, so we bought him his own inexpensive MP3 player. We have loaded onto it a variety of songs, not knowing what he might like. I am guessing that he simply enjoys the sound in his ears. Nevertheless, it seems odd to see a low-functioning autistic boy listening to David Bowie's "Blue Jean".

***************

We received a new hair clipper set for Christmas, one with a vacuum feature that makes for easy disposal of the clippings. Today's attempt at cutting Anthony's hair was far more successful than my previous one, although I suspect my wife will succumb shortly to the urge to use scissors to trim the uneven spots.